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oc·u·lusˈäkyələs/

Year : 2013 - 2017 

Life is dynamic in it's highs and lows. It is can be poignant and unpredictable. As human beings we seldom comprehend the circumstances that brought us to this exact moment. What should we be grateful for and what is our purpose on this Earth? For me, death has always been one of my greatest fears. Death is inevitable and unescapable. We are fragile beings, and as I've gotten older I've realized how fragile we really are. In the month of June 2013 I gained an intimate understanding of that fragility and how it pertains to me.

 

It was June 12 to be exact. I had just finished celebrating my twentieth birthday. I vividly remember the pain like it was yesterday. I would wake with an aching in my head coupled with a sense of impending doom (looming sense of death). I had experienced irregular menstrations for years so to me it was normal. Then the symptoms of pregnancy and menopause began. Although I was a virgin, I began lactating. I had previously never felt pain like the kind I began to suffer. I couldn't eat sleep or think without it's ruthless interjection. Although I was apprehensive at first, I finally decided to go see a specialist. I was diagnosed with a prolactinoma pituitary tumor, a hormone-secreting tumor on the pituitary gland. Finally the sickness had been given a name and to me it felt like punishment.

This series is an installation of photographic images, video art, and objects that all hold a certain significance towards the stages of my brain tumor. O.cu.lus is about my struggle suffering through the brain tumor, it's aftermath, and how it continues to affect my present-day life.